How fear is holding me back

“You can create anything you want, and if when you know that, it’s pointless to compare yourself to other people.” – Vasavi Kumar, a certified business coach.

I read a blog post by someone yesterday who listed the 10 things she wishes she had known when she started blogging. Going through the list, I identified with it. Yes, writing blog posts (blogging) is hard work and you have to learn a lot of technical stuff about your website, which is not so lekker.

I then told the blogger that if I had known what I am getting myself into, I wouldn’t have started blogging. I remember that I just started a blog, because I wanted to document some things. I didn’t fuss about who’s going to read it, about not doing a lot of promotion of my website, or even what the hell I should write about.

How many times have you weighed the pro’s and cons of something you want to do? Have you found that when you stall or delay to act on an idea, your doubts become more?

*raising my hand*

This takes me back to the time I failed the most at a certain thing in my life. I probably went for more than 20 driver’s tests at various traffic departments in Cape Town. I knew I had to get my driver’s license because it would help me get a job in journalism. I failed a lot – so because I was mocked by some people, I decided to stop counting how many times I went.

I stopped counting at the tenth driver’s test. Once I even realised that one particular driving school instructor taught me how to drive away from a pole – unlike the others. I then realised that some people don’t teach you how to do it the right way because they are out there to make money for themselves.

I now have my driver’s license after many failed attempts.

Looking back, I never thought of the future in my current situation (then). I just focused on the tasks I had to do to get there. Why can’t I seem to do it now? Why when I have an idea I am scared to implement it? So I delay in taking action. [insert people “boo-ing” now]

Recently I listened to one of my favourite podcasts Being Boss Club and Vasavi Kumar was the guest. She said this beautiful thing:

“If my art could help someone or put a smile on someone, it’s my duty and obligation to create.”
She added: “I have to answer to one person and that is myself.” [I had to add the last part because often our fear to take action is based on what we think other people will think of us.]

Vasavi continued: “My dad always said if you want to do something, don’t worry about the results – just do it.” [Don’t you just love that?]

Are you still scared?

Well, another thing I learned is that having an accountability partner or a life/ business coach or mentor helps.

For instance, last week was my second meeting with my blogging accountability partner after we agreed to meet once a month to discuss progress. This beautiful woman was grilling me lekkertjies. I complained about my lows and she was like: No dear, I want to hear about your high’s. What did you achieve and how did you achieve it?

Say whaaaaaaat? Really, she was into that. After we talked about my highs and how I got there, she asked me what am I going to continue on doing to achieve my goals for the next month. I seriously didn’t think of this before she said it. Holler to my accountability partner, Karin Londt.

An accountability partner/ mentor also reminds you of your strengths [and we tend to forget these].

I don’t even know how to end off this blog post, but I will say this: fear will always make its appearance. It is up to us to continue doing the tasks, focusing on the end goal.

No matter how long it takes, you will achieve the end goal. So create, don’t stop because of fear. Just do.

What motivates you to get to your goal? Have you ever experienced fear as you were busy creating something? Let me know in the comments below please. Thank you!